


The Lost Girl

by artificialalexandria



Category: RuPaul's Drag Race RPF
Genre: Angst, M/M, Past Character Death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-09
Updated: 2019-09-09
Packaged: 2020-10-13 14:11:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,506
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20583797
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/artificialalexandria/pseuds/artificialalexandria
Summary: Brock and Jose's marriage didn't work out and they haven't spoken in ten years. Brock is getting old and worn down, so he wants to find Jose and their daughter Vanessa. However, when he finds Jose, he realizes things aren't the way he left them ten years ago.





	The Lost Girl

After many years of trying to make their relationship work, Brock and Jose gave up and went their separate ways. They had everything: a house, their marriage, a child. However, they just couldn't work things out. Although Brock and Jose loved each other, they'd always wanted different things out of life.

He figured she was probably around twenty years now. Brock thought if he could just find Jose that Vanessa would be nearby. He always thought it was cute that Jose wanted to name their daughter after his former drag persona.

Since Brock hadn't heard from Jose in years, he didn't know where to start looking. His first idea was to get in contact with Akeria. Akeria was the only one of Jose's friends who hadn't completely cut him out of their lives.

"Hey, Akeria," Brock rubbed the back of his neck. "How are you?"

"Brock?" Akeria responded, his voice tight with disbelief hearing his voice over the phone. "What is it? Has something happened?"

"No, no, nothing’s happened," Brock said. "I know it's been a long time and I should've done this years ago, but I need your help finding Jose."

"Oh." Akeria took a deep breath. "I haven't talked to him in a while, but I have his latest phone number."

"Are you willing to give it to me?" Brock asked.

"Sure," Akeria said. "I don't think he'll want to talk to you, definitely won’t wanna see you, but you can surely try."

"Thank you," Brock breathed out a sigh of relief.

~~~

"Jose," Brock couldn't help but smile. "How have you been?"

"I've been okay," Jose laughed. "How did you even get my number?"

"Akeria," They both said, making them laugh.

"I've just been thinking about family a lot the older I get. Even though we're divorced, we're technically still family because we have a kid and I was wondering if I could maybe see you sometime-"

"I don't know," Jose sighed. "It's been ten years..."

"There's just some things I want to discuss," Brock said. "I'm not trying to get you back or anything like that."

"Oh," Jose laughed nervously. "I guess then it would be okay."

"Good," Brock smiled, feeling his body release weeks of tension. "Just tell me when and where."

~~~

He should have known Jose would still be in Florida. It’s where Jose was raised, where he escaped to raise their daughter without Brock all those years ago. 

Still, it struck him when he set eyes upon Jose in that coffee shop. Like he’d stepped right out of one of their wedding photos. "Hi," Brock smiled and waved as he took the seat across from Jose. "It's been so long."

"Wow, you're…" Jose paused to think of the word he was looking for. "Old."

Brock laughed. "And you haven't changed much at all. I'm old and gray while you still look…” Brock shook his head in amazement. “Gorgeous."

"What can I say?" Jose smiled. "I've got good genes. You've met my mother."

"You got me there," Brock held his hands up in defeat. "Your family has immortal beauty."

"So," Jose laughed. "What brings you here to see me?"

"I wanted to catch up," Brock shrugged.

“Why did you want to reconnect  _ now _ ?” Jose asked.

“I’m getting old, and overworking my body for years of drag and dance is catching up with me,” Brock admitted. “I can’t deny my morality any longer and I want to spend what time I have left with my family.”

"You knew if you kept pushing so hard that your body would quit on you eventually. Not much has happened on my end," Jose said with a shrug. "Since moving back home, I've just been enjoying being retired."

"And what about Vanessa?" Brock asked.

Jose nearly choked on his drink. Next time he looked upon his ex husband, he’d gone practically Taylor Swift white. "Brock.” Jose lowered his voice. “How has no one ever told you?"

Brock tilted his head."Told me what?" His stomach clenched and he felt the warmth draining from his own face watching Jose’s reaction. Immediately, Brock’s long neglected sense of fatherhood kicked in as his brain ran through all the horrible reasons Jose must be acting like this. 

"She…" Jose took a deep breath, looking away, his lids fluttering, jaw clenching. "Brock, she… she died. Five years ago."

"What?" Brock gasped, his heart racing.

Vanessa had been the sweetest little girl. Brock absolutely adored every moment with her. She was Brock’s baby girl and they never left each other’s side until he moved out. After the divorce, Vanessa kept asking to see Brock, or at least talk to him on the phone, but Jose wouldn’t let her. It made Vanessa distant from Jose, but he thought he was doing what was right for her. Vanessa missed her father too much to listen, so she called him at least once a day, which made Jose furious, but he figured if she was going to sneak around to call Brock anyway, he might as well just let her do it.

"She was learning how to drive…” Jose looked away, tears in his eyes. “and some idiot crossed lanes and hit us head on...I was in the car with her,” He paused, trying his best to keep it together a little bit longer. “It was so hard. I always wished it was me instead."

“That has to be a lie, some kind of sick joke.” Brock shook his head. “There’s no way… my baby girl.”

“I’m sorry, Brock,” Jose said quietly. “Believe me, I wish it wasn’t true.”

"Why didn't you call me?" Tears rolled down Brock's cheeks and he clenched his fists. "Why didn't you tell me this years ago?"

Jose held his head in his hands. "I was still so angry at you for leaving. I figured someone would've told you… so I didn’t have to. When you didn't come to the funeral,” he let out a humorless laugh. “Well, I figured you just didn't care."

"Of  _ course _ I cared," Brock shook his head in disbelief. "I love our daughter. I would've been there if I'd known. I would have..."

"She used to call you all the time even when I didn't want her to," Jose said, his eyes far away. "You didn't find it weird when it stopped? You didn't think to look for her?"

"She was a teenager," Brock looked down, feeling something in his chest sink, down, down, down, lower and lower. "I thought she just didn't want to talk to me anymore."

"No," Jose shook his head. "She missed you every second you were apart."

"I'm so sorry," Brock sighed deeply. "I should've tried harder. I should've..."

"It's okay," Jose grabbed his hand for the first time in ten years. "At least you know the truth now. I'm sure she'd be happy to know that you came looking."

"I think so too," Brock nodded. "God, she never knew I still loved her.” 

"She knew how you felt," Jose squeezed his hand. "Just because you never saw each other doesn't mean she didn't know you loved her. You talked all the time. "

Brock ran his hands through his hair, his mind racing. “I’ll never see her graduate high school, get married, have kids, any of it."

“Neither will I,” Jose gently squeezed his hand. “I’d give anything for us to get that back.”

Brock took a deep breath. "I guess you're right."

"I can take you to the cemetery if you want," Jose said.

Brock smiled weakly. "I would love that." 

~~~

Brock held Jose's hand as they made their way over to their daughter's grave. It was an act of comfort between old friends rather than exes rekindling their love. It felt like they were back to the way things were after they broke up the first time all those years ago.

"Here it is," Jose dropped Brock's hand as they reached Vanessa's grave. There was a bouquet of flowers resting against the headstone from Jose's last visit.

"Is that a recent picture of her?" Brock asked, pointing to the picture on the headstone. "I mean, before..."

Jose nodded. "It was taken about a month before she died."

"Wow," Brock squatted down to get a closer look at it. "She was beautiful. When I last saw her, she was practically still a little girl."

"A lot can change in five years," Jose put a hand on Brock's shoulder.

"I wish we could've worked out our marriage," Brock stood up. "I barely even recognize my little girl in that photo. She grew up and I didn't even realize it."

"It's okay," Jose took his hand and squeezed it gently. "You're here now."

Brock hugged Jose. It felt like visiting a town you haven’t lived in for years but still feels like home. "Thank you for bringing me here. This is the closure I needed."

"You're welcome," Jose sighed. "Wherever she is, I hope she knows we're here together."

"Me too," Brock smiled sadly as they pulled away. "Me too."


End file.
